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Advice to 25 year old me....


  As I celebrate another year of life I honestly found myself conflicted and not really in the mood to celebrate. If you know me I'm usually yelling "Milantober" all month long. 😅 But here we are it's my birthday and I feel completely different.... Is this what growing up feels like?

  I'll give y'all a little background before we jump right into this.. 24 started rough... AF! I was working a job I HATED! If there was any way for y'all to hear me screaming.. Just know I screamed that like Tokyo Toni and I was ready to get TF ASAP! Ya girl was tired mentally, physically, and spiritually. I was through! But I had to stay faithful... so I started trying to be on time for work and actually being mentally present while I was there and that didn't work. 😂 I got written up at work and I was like you know what... I don't have to deal with this! So I started planning my exit with no job offer. A lot of people told me not to but my spirit was heavy and it was a lot to carry every day. God worked it out. The next week..... I had a job offer because a friend of mine had recommended me for the position (HEY SIS!). Just because I had a new job doesn't mean life wasn't about to let up. My professional life was poppin' but my personal life took a turn in the opposite direction. Car trouble knocked on my door a couple of times and I wasn't trying to answer.  I also found myself in situations where I just could've been a better friend.. and didnt know how. Among other things that happened, I found myself trying to pick up the pieces and not knowing exactly where they went. But this isn't about struggling it's about growth. Now that you're sort of caught up let's get into why you're here.


So I asked on IG yesterday "What advice would you give your 25-year-old self?" I wasn't expecting the number of responses I got from all my IG family.  I wanted to share them so I ( and y'all ) could come back and read them when you need it. 😊 


  • Always practice gratitude, value your peace, and live below your means.
  • It's a marathon. We all trying to figure this life shit out. Keep going, keep being YOU!
  • Don't hold grudges. Apologize when you know you're in the wrong.
  • Continue being a student to life. Read, travel, love, and explore. 
  • Reevaluate friendships. We tend to outgrow people as we age.
  • Be intentional. With your actions, your words, and your energy. 
  • "Most people quit because they look at how far they have to go not how far they've come."
  • Travel more. Spend more time with your family and friends. Your job and material things can wait. 
  • Be thankful for every day. Celebrate how far you've come. Prioritize your savings.
  • Don't let anyone tell you what or where you should be in life.
  • You're exactly where you're supposed to be right now. Don't rush it. Enjoy your journey!
  • Continue to find yourself, prime yourself for your next big step. Even at 25.
  • Appreciate the process and where you are in it!
  • Shit will go left but continue to live right.
  • Be bold and love more. Refuse to let fear hold you back and forgive quickly!
  • Chill out! Everything is going to come together in perfect timing.
  • Do what you want to do at all times.
  • Be gentle with yourself. As long as you're moving forward, that's the most important thing.
  • Your bad decisions don't make up all of who you are.
  • Save, Save, Save!
  • There is value in your season of waiting. God will use everything you have experienced to bless you. 
  • Slow down on drinking.😂
  • Be aggresive with your goals. Keep a dope mentor and mentee. 
  • Start a gratitude journal and celebrate your small wins. 
  • Start on your goals NOW. Pave the way for you future NOW. Lay the foundation NOW.
  • Only thing that counts is hard work.  
  • 2 Timothy 1:7 You have all power. Go for all of your dreams and love others fearlessly.
  • Eat more veggies & go to the gym!
  • You're where you need to be for internal growth but it's also the ghetto! 😂
  • Stick to the plan. Put yourself first period. Dont be afraid to make solo trips. 
  • Define your own happiness. Dont allow others to define or dictate it for you.

Now as I sit back and think about 24 I feel like it was the preparation for my victory lap. For something greater than me. I was being primed and molded so when my opportunity came I would be prepared and more importantly THANKFUL!  It also taught me more about relationships.  How to be a better friend, apologize when I'm wrong, and be a listening ear when needed. I pray that you read something in here that gave you hope, uplifted you, made you think twice about a situation and do the right thing, and overall just made you happy inside. I promise it gets better.

As I walk into my new year I hold no grudges, I'm hopeful for the future, I'm grinding and networking harder, and I'm aligning myself with my dreams and the right people.


Books I would recommend: 
More Than Enough- Elaine Welteroth
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/more-than-enough-elaine-welteroth/1129999827?ean=9781984879486#/

The Defining Decade- Meg Jay
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-defining-decade-meg-jay/1110780430?ean=9780446561754#/

Songs that make me feel good: I Want You Around- Snoh Aalegra, Expectations (feat. 6LACK)- Wale, Grateful-Mahalia

Podcasts I'm obsessed with: Crime Junkies, Whoreible Decisions, Yes, Girl!, Transformation Church, Woman Evolve

Thank you to all of you that contributed to this and took the time to lend a word to those who may need it. It means more than you know. 
Thank you for loving me when I'm imperfect and accepting me flaws and all. I'm continously working on being a better me.
Thank you for reading and Happy Milantober! 😘

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